The First Day
by SarahLou
Summary: a prequel of sorts to my story Last Day on Earth. This story depicts how all the RENTers were born. ReadReviewEnjoy
1. Collins

Back by popular demand (hah just kidding) Anyway, this is the story of how all the RENTers were born, in chronological order. Please read and review, they mean the world to me! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: yeah, I don't own the characters, just the ideas.

Collins was the first to be born. Somewhere in between the fog and haze of weed and free spirits, he was conceived by two very young twenty somethings. His mother was a club-hoppin' show-stoppin' diva, or at least she was before she got pregnant. Marcia was born in theBronx and knew what it meant to have a rough life. Getting pregnant was the last thing she wanted.

Collin's father, Tom,was a genius, but never went to college, so he worked at the burger barn. There weren't many opportunities forblack men in the late 60's.

On a warm summer day Collins was born. However, like much of Collins life, the day was not all smooth sailing.

"Bob! Bob! I. NEED. ANOTHER. PICKLE"

"Hold on Marcia, you had a pickle like 5 minutes ago!"

"I know, I know, but the baby's kicking and I need another pickle." Marcia sighed as she put her swollen feet on the old, wooden coffee table. She hated being pregnant. She wasn't supposed to even be pregnant. It was Bob's fault, she thought bitterly as her soon-to-be husband ran around the trailer looking for the pickles.

What she hated most about being pregnant was that she was missing out on the carefree lifestyle she loved so much. No more partying until 2 in the morning and no more shopping for cute new outfits to wear. She also hated Bob's trailor, he was a slob and although she had been in worse conditions, she thought he would at least live in an apartment and not a stupid trailor.

"well, i guess he's doing the best he can." she said to herself, as she thought of her desired pickle.

Bob was going to go crazy. He hadn't planned for Marcia to get pregnant. He hadn't planned to sleep with Marcia in the first place, he hated it. All he wanted was his life back. He felt so out of control. Bob grabbed the pickle jar, which somehow ended up in the bedroom, ran back into the living room andslammed it down on the coffee table.

"It was in the bedroom." he said angrily as he sat down in a chair on the other side of the room.

"Well...no need to get mad. I must have misplaced it." She said as she reached in and grabbed for her long-awaited treat.

Later that night Marcia went into labor.

"GET IT OUT OF ME! BOB GET IT OUT OF ME!" Marcia screamed as Bob drove her as quickly as he could to the local hospital. He had seen Marcia mad before but this was just nuts. She looked like she was possesed.

"I'm driving as fast as I can just give me a few more minutes!" Bob wailed as he sped fast the second red light in a row. Soon, a cop car followed.

"Dammit!" Bob said as the cop car turned on their sirens. Marcia screamed again.

"What's wrong?" Marcia said, turning around. "Oh come on! You have to be kidding me. Don't stop!" Bob started to push on the brakes anyway.

"DON'T STOP!" she repeated, a little bit more angrily. There was a wild look in her eyes. Bob wasn't sure if it was anger or pain but he knew he had better listen. With the cop car hot on his trail he continued heading toward the hospital…

**SLAM**

**BOOM**

**CRASH**

It was too bad Bob didn't notice the huge Cadillac he rear-ended. He looked at Marcia, who was frozen with shock. After a few moments of sitting in silence she let out another ear piercing scream

"IT'S COMING! BOB I CAN'T HOLD IT ANYMORE, THE BABY IS COMING RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW...AHHHH!"

A cop knocked on Bob's window, people started coming out of their houses and a disgruntled woman stepped of the Cadillac.

"um, sir, could you step out of the vehicle, please."

"excuse me, officer, but I don't have time to do this right now. My—uh…well this lady is pregnant with my kid and if I don't get her to the hospital she's going to blow right now, and I really don't want to mess up my car."

"Listen, Mister, I don't care if your wife is in labor or not, you rear ended this woman's vehicleand you refused to pull over when I started tracking you for all those red lights, so if you could please step out of the vehicle and allow me to give you your ticket we can solve this right here, right n—"

"I can't believe you punched the cop." An exhausted Marcia said as she laid down on the jail bench and hugged her belly. The contractions had stopped—for the time being, but she knew the baby was going to come soon.

"Well did you hear what he was saying? And don't lay down on that bench, people with all sorts of venereal diseases have sat on that thing. And the last thing I want is a funky baby with some sort of…distortion."

"I thought you didn't want the baby at all." Marcia said sharply as she winced and sat back up.

"Well, maybe I do." Bob said indiginently as he lit up a cigarette.

"Okay, well, there isn't going to BE a baby unless you get us out of here, because I think the contractions are starting to come again."

"Again? That's what you said last time, and look where it's gotten us!"

"No, this time it's for real! I can tell."

"Well, it looks like you're going to have to hold it in there for a little while longer because I don't think we're getting out of here any time soon."

"BOB I NEED TO GET IT OUT OF ME NOW, IT'S TEARING ME IN TWO! LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO ME! AHHH GET THIS DEMON SEED OUT!"

"Okay, okay…um, does anybody here have a pair of latex gloves on them?" Bob asked the other people in the cell.

"Excuse me, sir, Hi, my name is Big Willie, and I swear I'm a certified doctor, I think I can help." One of the bigger inmates said. Marcia looked up at Bob and shook her head 'no' but Bob didn't see any other way to get this over with.

"Hi Willie, I'm Bob, and this my…this is the mother of my kid. Are you sure you're a certified doctor?" Marcia screamed as another contraction came.

"Well, in Canada I am."

"Good enough."

"Hi! My name is Maria Schunard and I'm here with your local news. Tonight, a man and his girlfriend gave birth to a baby in our local jail at 10:00 pm. Bob Collins, the father, has said that he was falsely charged with running a red light from a drunk cop and that the jail should be fined with making his wife give birth in the jail cell. Anyway, the baby is a boy, 6 pounds, 4 ounces. He seems to have no problems and his mom looks happy. The parents have decided to name him Tom—Tom Collins."

Little Tom Collins was laying in his mothers arms while she travelled to the hospital. The cops had let her go to make sure everything was okay with her and the baby.She looked at her son with a loving look in her eye. Maybe being a mother wasn't going to be so bad.


	2. Joanne

**Authors note: I must apologize for my space key and/or the editor on this site. It seems that a lot of my words are ending up together without the space in between them. As a reader as well as a writer I know this must be extremely annoying and I am working on triple checking my work. I'm sorry for this inconvenience. Thank you for all your support and reviews they mean the world to me!**

Disclaimer: I don't own RENT, Jonathon does.

**Joanne Jefferson**

_"Hank! Hank! It's a girl, we're having a girl, oh gosh, I knew it. She's going to be so beautiful when she gets older, oh Hank aren't you happy?" _

_3 months later...  
_

Joanne Jefferson was born on a cold winter evening. Her mother was extremely excited to be having a child considering the doctor said that she would never be able to get pregnant or give birth. After months of careful planning and a lot of faith, 38 year old Carol Jefferson was finally pregnant; she was going to be a mother.

Carol was probably the most excited pregnant woman to ever live in New York. She would put on her jazz music and dance around the house just holding her tummy. She had even gone so far as to decorate Joanne's room in pink everything, even before she and her husband had found out what the sex of the baby was going to be. Carol had just known that the baby was going to be a girl; she just wished Hank was more excited.

Hank was trying as hard as he could to be excited for the new baby. It wasn't that he didn't want a baby, he did. He just wished it wasn't a girl. He wanted a boy that would be able to carry on the Jefferson name and the tradition of becoming something prestigious. He prayed to God that his daughter didn't turn into one of those hippies that he was seeing on TV lately, or even worse: a lesbian. If he was going to have a daughter he was going to make sure she turned out normal. He was going to teach her from day 1 that she wasn't going to be a singer or an actress, she was going to do something practical. A doctor or a laywer seemed like a good profession to him.

After nine months of his wife being pregnant, Hank was finally able to fully appreciate how much Carol actually did for him. Now that she couldn't climb the stairs of their two story colonial, he had to do almost everything. Cooking and cleaning wasn't that bad but he hated doing the laundry. Carol had already chastised him for ruining two of her favorite shirts. The last thing he wanted was a pregnant, hormonal, estrogen-filled woman bossing him around, but he loved his wife so he put up with it.

"Aren't you excited for the baby, Hun?" Carol asked one day as she was lying on the couch reading East of Eden

"I guess so" Hank sighed.

"Well, you better be excited, because my water just broke."

"WHAT?"

"I think we should probably go to the hospital now."

* * *

"Do you have everything you need?" 

"Yes, I already told you I packed the suitcase two nights ago incase anything like this happened." Carol replied as she put her suitcase in the car. "Hank, would you please stop shaking?"

"Sorry, it's just I've never done this before!"

"You've never driven?" Carol asked, smiling, hoping her joke would lighten the mood, however, one look from her irritable husband told her she had failed.

"Let's just get this over with." Hank mumbled.

"What was that, sweetie?"

"Nothing."

The Jefferson's lived about 20 minutes away from the nearest hospital. On the way there Carol kept turning the knobs on the radio, much to Hank's dismay.

"It's those protestors again. They keepyelling about that damn war."

"The one in Vietnam?" Carol asked serenely from the passenger's seat, reading a book, deciding nothing was good on the radio.

"Yeah…say, you don't look like you're going into labor. Aren't you supposed to be screaming your brains out?" Hank asked suspiciously.

"Hank, I'm not going to make a fool of myself like that woman on the news did last year. Do you remember that? Her baby was born in a jail. How disgusting."

"Oh yeah, I remember that! Didn't the husband get locked up for possession of marijuana or something?"

"Yes, now that you mention it, I think he did. Oh, look, we're here. Please drop me off at the door and then you can park the car, I don't want to do more walking than I have to." Carol was squirming with excitement at the thought of finally being able to give birth. After nine long months of waiting, it was finally time.

The birth of little Joanne was pretty quiet. Carol only screamed at the very end and even then she hardly broke a sweat. Hank thought Carol was showing a lot of grace under pressure which was what he had always loved about his wife. He couldn't help but be resentful of Joanne. She was going to come in between the love that him and his wife had shared for the past 12 years.

"Do you want to hold her?" Carol asked, beaming.

"I'm not really good with kids." Hank sputtered.

"Come on, sweetie, she's not just my baby you know." Carol said, handing Hank the tiny 7 pound bundle of joy.

"Oh, alright." Hank said as he took the baby. Joanne yawned wide and smiled a big toothless smile. Hank felt his heart melt a littlefor the first time in awhile. He realized that out of all the things he had created in his life, this may be the best one. He wasn't going to make any mistakes with his daughter; she was going to grow up with the best education, the best parents, just the best of everything. Because if he was the best, then his daughter had to be the best.

"I can see it right now, in 30 years she's going to be a rich lawyer, married to a nice man and have plenty of kids. Our daughter isn't going to be some hippie freak. She's going to be the best."

"Hank, isn't it a little early to be planning out her future?"

"Nope, I can see it now, she's going to be a winner, my winner, my Joanne."

a/n: sorry, i suck with doing things that involve Joanne. I found this chapter quite boring, but I hope you like it. Review and tell me what you would like to see next or if you have any good ideas, or just want to tell me you liked this chapter. haha.


	3. Roger

a/n: alright this chapter is going to be different than my normal stuff. sorry for the lack of updates. i had every author's worst nightmare: my keyboard broke. gulp okay so here is Roger's chapter. Warning for cheesy-ness

Disclaimer: not mine! I only own my idea.

Colleen Fontaine gave birth to Roger when she was merely sixteen years old. It was in the back of her boyfriend, Mike's truck on a summer night during a Led Zeppelin concert. Mike knew that Colleen had a huge crush on Jimmy Page and had decided to take her there for their one year anniversary. Unfortunately they didn't see much of the concert, seeing as how they never made it to the door.

When Colleen told Mike she was pregnant, he didn't know how to react. He had forgotten a condom and had just assumed she was on birth control. Not knowing three months later that she would come up to him and tell him straight out "I'm pregnant". Not only was he disappointed in himself, but he knew his parents would be disappointed as well. Colleen was not the kind of girl he would ideally date. He was every parents' American dream: good grades, good looks and an awesome football player. Colleen, on the other hand, well she was less than perfect. She almost failed math, she wasn't all that pretty and nobody really liked her.

So why did Mike? It was something he couldn't really say. He just knew that he was attracted to her. Probably her smile is what caught him first. The rest of her face was just 'okay', but she had a beautiful smile. Nobody expected their relationship to last, all of their friends thought it was a joke. Mostly because Mike was eighteen and he was dating a sophomore. However, Mike proved that he was serious after taking her on three dates and then the homecoming dance. But after he found out she was pregnant, he wanted out of the relationship as soon as possible.

"Can't we just get an abortion?"

"No"

"Adoption?"

"My mom says that's the easy way out."

"Well what do you think we should do?"

"Keep it."

Mike was angry at first that Colleen had decided to keep the baby. Didn't she realize that he had a scholarship on the line, not to mention the fact that he didn't want to be a dad? He thought she was being extremely selfish and that if she really loved him she would have an abortion, his parents would probably pay. Or at least give it up for adoption.

He realized after awhile that if the pregnancy was hard on him then it must be torture for Colleen. It wasn't him who had to deal with the embarrassment of a growing belly but also the kids at school who would probably make fun of her. She wasn't exactly popular and being pregnant at his high school was basically a death sentence.

Colleen knew how her parents were going to react to the pregnancy, they would be thrilled. Her pot-smoking free-loving parents had no boundaries and hadn't even bothered teaching her about safe sex for fear that it would "limit her sexual experience." whatever. There wasn't day that didn't go by without Colleen wishing she had different parents. Or at least parents that would have bought her birth control.

"Mom, did you hear me? I said I'm pregnant."

"That's GREAT Colleen. Your father and I always wanted to be grandparents."

"Mom, I'm sixteen."

"Sweetie, age isn't anything but a number. I'm just so happy for you and Mike! I bet you his parents areexcited too!"

At Mike's house…

"She's WHAT?"

"Mom, calm down."

"You got that trailer trash girlfriend of yours PREGNANT? How could you be so stupid?"  
"She's not trailer trash. She's my girlfriend, I love her and yes, she's pregnant."

"Do you realize that this is going to cripple your future? The rest of your life is going to be altered because of that stupid twit!"

"Shut up, mom. Dad, tell her to shut up, she doesn't know anything about Colleen."

"Your mother's right, son."

"It doesn't help that her hippie parents are probably endorsing the entire thing. Oh what is this world coming to?"

Colleen told Mike about her parent's reactions and he laughed. He would have killed to have Colleen's parents. Colleen felt bad after hearing what his parents had said but she understood where they were coming from. She was going nowhere and he had his while life ahead of him. She had ruined his future and his life, she felt so guilty.

Colleen went to school for the rest of the pregnancy. Mike stayed by her side for the entire ordeal and whenever anybody said something derogatory he made sure that they were feeling some sort of pain. For this, Colleen was grateful. It didn't help that people were talking about her behind her back, though. When Colleen came home from school crying her parents didn't understand how mean other kids could be and told her to just ignore it.

Roger was born in March. Cold, rainy, windy March. This made Colleen glad, she hated the fall. It was wheneverything died. Mike and her had broken up a few months before the birth, it was her decision. She thought it would be easier if he only had an attachment to the baby and not to her. This way he could still go to college and not feel guilty about leaving a girlfriend AND a baby back home. Now he only had to worry about child support.

Roger was a cesarean section baby. The umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, twice. The doctors thought he wasn't going to make it but at the last minute they were able to get him before he was completely choked to death. Mike stood by and held Colleen's hand the entire time. He was the one who decided on the name Roger. He thought it sounded 'cool' and Colleen added that it sounded like a Rock-Star name.

Roger turned out to be the cutest blonde-haired blue-eyed baby that side of New York had ever seen. He was dressed in cut-up child sized Led Zeppelin, Kiss and Deep Purple t-shirts because Colleen couldn't afford anything else. Colleen was even able to finish high school because her parents were sohappy to be taking care of their adorable grandson. Mike's parents were happy to have nothing to do with the baby.

Mike did end up going off to college but visited regularly to see his son and ex-girlfriend. Colleen didn't know this, but after college he made a seldom vow that he was going to propose. He knew that they belonged together.

Colleen Fontaine gave birth to Roger when she was merely sixteen years old. It was in the back of her boyfriend, Mike's truck on a summer night during a Led Zeppelin concert. Mike knew that Colleen had a huge crush on Jimmy Page and had decided to take her there for their one year anniversary. Unfortunately they didn't see much of the concert, seeing as how they never made it to the door.

When Colleen told Mike she was pregnant, he didn't know how to react. He had forgotten a condom and had just assumed she was on birth control. Not knowing three months later that she would come up to him and tell him straight out "I'm pregnant". Not only was he disappointed in himself, but he knew his parents would be disappointed as well. Colleen was not the kind of girl he would ideally date. He was every parents' American dream: good grades, good looks and an awesome football player. Colleen, on the other hand, well she was less than perfect. She almost failed math, she wasn't all that pretty and nobody really liked her.

So why did Mike? It was something he couldn't really say. He just knew that he was attracted to her. Probably her smile is what caught him first. The rest of her face was just 'okay', but she had a beautiful smile. Nobody expected their relationship to last, all of their friends thought it was a joke. Mostly because Mike was eighteen and he was dating a sophomore. However, Mike proved that he was serious after taking her on three dates and then the homecoming dance. But after he found out she was pregnant, he wanted out of the relationship as soon as possible.

"Can't we just get an abortion?"

"No"

"Adoption?"

"My mom says that's the easy way out."

"Well what do you think we should do?"

"Keep it."

Mike was angry at first that Colleen had decided to keep the baby. Didn't she realize that he had a scholarship on the line, not to mention the fact that he didn't want to be a dad? He thought she was being extremely selfish and that if she really loved him she would have an abortion, his parents would probably pay. Or at least give it up for adoption.

He realized after awhile that if the pregnancy was hard on him then it must be torture for Colleen. It wasn't him who had to deal with the embarrassment of a growing belly but also the kids at school who would probably make fun of her. She wasn't exactly popular and being pregnant at his high school was basically a death sentence.

Colleen knew how her parents were going to react to the pregnancy, they would be thrilled. Her pot-smoking free-loving parents had no boundaries and hadn't even bothered teaching her about safe sex for fear that it would "limit her sexual experience." whatever. There wasn't day that didn't go by without Colleen wishing she had different parents. Or at least parents that would have bought her birth control.

"Mom, did you hear me? I said I'm pregnant."

"That's GREAT Colleen. Your father and I always wanted to be grandparents."

"Mom, I'm sixteen."

"Sweetie, age isn't anything but a number. I'm just so happy for you and Mike! I bet you his parents areexcited too!"

At Mike's house…

"She's WHAT?"

"Mom, calm down."

"You got that trailer trash girlfriend of yours PREGNANT? How could you be so stupid?"  
"She's not trailer trash. She's my girlfriend, I love her and yes, she's pregnant."

"Do you realize that this is going to cripple your future? The rest of your life is going to be altered because of that stupid twit!"

"Shut up, mom. Dad, tell her to shut up, she doesn't know anything about Colleen."

"Your mother's right, son."

"It doesn't help that her hippie parents are probably endorsing the entire thing. Oh what is this world coming to?"

Colleen told Mike about her parent's reactions and he laughed. He would have killed to have Colleen's parents. Colleen felt bad after hearing what his parents had said but she understood where they were coming from. She was going nowhere and he had his while life ahead of him. She had ruined his future and his life, she felt so guilty.

Colleen went to school for the rest of the pregnancy. Mike stayed by her side for the entire ordeal and whenever anybody said something derogatory he made sure that they were feeling some sort of pain. For this, Colleen was grateful. It didn't help that people were talking about her behind her back, though. When Colleen came home from school crying her parents didn't understand how mean other kids could be and told her to just ignore it.

Roger was born in March. Cold, rainy, windy March. This made Colleen glad, she hated the fall. It was wheneverything died. Mike and her had broken up a few months before the birth, it was her decision. She thought it would be easier if he only had an attachment to the baby and not to her. This way he could still go to college and not feel guilty about leaving a girlfriend AND a baby back home. Now he only had to worry about child support.

Roger was a cesarean section baby. The umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck, twice. The doctors thought he wasn't going to make it but at the last minute they were able to get him before he was completely choked to death. Mike stood by and held Colleen's hand the entire time. He was the one who decided on the name Roger. He thought it sounded 'cool' and Colleen added that it sounded like a Rock-Star name.

Roger turned out to be the cutest blonde-haired blue-eyed baby that side of New York had ever seen. He was dressed in cut-up child sized Led Zeppelin, Kiss and Deep Purple t-shirts because Colleen couldn't afford anything else. Colleen was even able to finish high school because her parents were sohappy to be taking care of their adorable grandson. Mike's parents were happy to have nothing to do with the baby.

Mike did end up going off to college but visited regularly to see his son and ex-girlfriend. Colleen didn't know this, but after college he made a seldom vow that he was going to propose. He knew that they belonged together.

Okay: I know this is different than my normal endings. It's really cheesy. But I'm not going to repeat the same kind of half happy/half cynical ending all the time. Next time i promise an angst-filled birth...haha. Just bear with me this one time.


	4. Maureen

sorry to Roger and all of you that my last chapter was a load of crap.

an: Sorry, everybody, for the delay. but between reading Farenheit 451 for AP 11 English and my new job (yay...not) at Krogers i have found it difficult to find time for my passion, writing. but, i am not one to leave a story hanging. so here is the next installment, at 3 in the morning, enjoy. i am feeling a little lost in my creative juices right now so if anybody has any suggestions for any of the other characters that i have yet to write about, then please, i would enjoy hearing them. and i will credit you if you do.

disclaimer: i do not own RENT. unfortunately. Oh, and i make no money by writing this. which i am glad for. because doing what i love for free sure beats 6.50 an hour for bagging somebody's groceries.

* * *

Cheryl wished she had followed her mothers advice and said "never trust guys with blonde hair or glasses." which was exactly what Todd was. He was tall, gangly, and gross. Cheryl, on the other hand, was drunk. She wasn't sure which one was worse; being ugly and sober or being great looking and totally wasted.

"Hey, uh…what's your name again?"

"It's Cheryl."

"Well, Cheryl, the condom broke."

"How could it break?"

"I bought it when I was in the 7th grade."

"Did you know it was broke before you put it on?"

"NO! I swear!"

"Great, I could be pregnant."

Todd was not used to good looking women approaching him. Cheryl was gorgeous. Long, auburn hair, stunning green eyes and a killer body. He wondered how he ended up so lucky. Todd was not the kind of guy that women would usually go for. It wasn't until he found out that she was wasted until he understood why she had come on to him.

* * *

Cheryl almost died when she saw the blue strip. She couldn't believe it. She was pregnant with this dork's kid. What was she going to do? The baby was probably going to be disgusting looking.

"Well?"

"Todd, I'm pregnant."

"Are you sure?"

"It says the test is 99 accurate…"

"Shit."

"Stop complaining."

"I'm not ready to be a father."

"You don't have to carry the thing around for nine months, do you?"

"…"

"That's what I thought. Now shut your big, fat, stupid broken condom-carrying mouth and get me a doctor appointment."

Todd couldn't believe what was happening. He was going to be a daddy. Granted, he was only twenty years old, but heck, he was going to be able to raise a little boy or girl and teach him or her about life and living. He was excited, even if Cheryl wasn't.

* * *

Cheryl looked at herself in the mirror. "blimp" was an understatement. She looked huge, and Todd kept coming around. He obviously didn't get that she had rejected him before she even found out that she was pregnant, but he kept coming aroun and he wouldn't leave. Now, he was at her house all the time.

"Cheryl?"

"What?"

"You look really great in that sweater"

"Shut up, I look fat and it's your fault."

"I never ASKED for the condom to break."

"Well, I never asked for it to break either."

"Cheryl?"

"WHAT?"

"Do you want me to, like, marry you now?"

"NO."

"Well I was just thinking…"

"Shut up."

"Right."

Todd thought Cheryl looked gorgeous. She was plump and vivacious and full of life. She didn't seem as happy about the weight gain but going from 115 to 145 can be heartbreaking to any good-looking woman. Todd still thought she was as attractive as ever and even though she didn't want to marry him, he was still in love with her.

* * *

"Todd?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for sticking around."

* * *

Cheryl hadn't really thought about names until she found out the sex of the baby. She wasn't sure whether she wanted a boy or a girl but once she found out that it was a girl she was a little bit excited. Of course, she would never have told Todd that. He would have gotten the impression that she wanted him to marry her again.

"What should we name it?"

"The baby is not an 'it' Cheryl, it is a girl."

"You know what I meant."

"I think we should name her Maureen."

"Maureen? No, that's out of the question. Maureen is an ugly name."

"That was my grandma's name."

"Well, if she looks anything like you then I guess the name fits the person."

"What's wrong with the name Todd?"

"What isn't?"

Todd let Cheryl's comments slide. He realized her hormones and her stress level was up so he should just let things go. He was certain that their child was going to be named Maureen. That name just struck a chord inside his heart. Her name was Maureen and that was final.

* * *

Cheryl was in the most excruciating pain.

"Cheryl, did you hear the doctor? He said PUSH."

"I AM pushing you bastard!"

"Well, obviously you're not pushing hard enough."

"Actually, why don't you do something useful instead of sitting there like an idiot."

"What am I supposed to do? Sit with your parents, who by the way hate me?"

"Forget it."

Todd was extremely excited. The baby was coming and he was going to be a daddy at last.

* * *

"Umm…Todd Johnson, are you the father?"

"Yes."

"Cheryl said that you should be the one to name the baby. Are you and Cheryl married?"

"No, and we never will be, thank God."

"Well…what are you going to name her?"

"Her name is Maureen. Maureen Johnson."

* * *

"I can't believe you named her Maureen. Can you imagine the ridicule she's going to have to go through all her life because you named her something like Maureen? I never should have let you name the baby."

"Shut up, Cheryl. Look, she's smiling!"

"I think she just pooped her pants."

An: shot, simple, and what? All dialogue. Nooooo! Alas, yes, I have made a chapter all dialogue. It's annoying, it's choppy and it's original…shoot me. Oh and if you can name the movie that the broken condom thing comes from at the beginning then i will give you a cookie or something crazy.


End file.
